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No One to Carry On Carry On No One to Remember What If We All Were Left Alone?

December 8, 2015

No One to Carry On Carry On  No One to Remember What If  We All Were Left Alone?

“Ultimately Its Up to You All”

No more lying down at night frightened alarmed exhausted from feeling scared all the time burdened with the preemptive sense that you’re always in imminent danger always hanging on the end of the feeling of being omitted left out left behind carried in a wallet that is tattered and thrown in a moldy heap

 

burdened by the lack of air panicked frozen  left to stare into space  as an orphan without a trace of who you are and where you’re from or what mattered most of all that someone knows where you come from

can sit and hold you listen look in your eyes hold your hand and comfort you with their warmth and presence just by sitting and rocking you to sleep. 

 

You often have the premonition that this last time will be the ultimate that you will no longer be dangling  serving a term of endless nights days recovering from the fear of losing another part of you   another piece of your heart another part of your spirit another lost memory of longing just to sit without any one looking at you or seeing how much every movement, every sound, every stirring threatens your life makes you realize that you have no choice and you shake in fear you start up and wander aimlessly   looking for a place that is frozen and that no one can hear you shriek or cry your self to sleep

 

for to far too many you’re no one and no one knows what you’re doing or why you cry yourself to sleep, they never hear the anguish in your voice the muffled steps the dragging of your feet, their sense is that you’ll die alone anyway no matter what and that you don’t deserve a thing, certainly not love or affection and certainly not a warm place to lie down and rest

 

they look at you as though this is the last time they’ll ever have to endure your sound your breathing your cursed and most always you feel their word wrings true you gave up grace and hope long long ago

 

 

ultimately it is up to us all to remember and recall that once that this young one was ready willing and able to answer every call.

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