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Everything and Everyone Turned Against Me and My Own Sustenance Withered, Waned as I folded and Went Within Seeking a Refuge from Life’s Living Waters

March 12, 2016

 

Life Turned Off Shunned Stunted Shamed

 

Everything and Everyone Turned Against Me and My Own Sustenance Withered, Waned as I folded and Went Within Seeking a Refuge from Life’s Living Waters

 

Everyone departed

 

I became a ghost

trapped in a covenant of despair and doubt

covered  my remorse at my truly grieving which I caused everyone I touched

I lost my land my hearth and home my friends family  my foundation I loss everything I held dear

I lost my will purpose and retained nagging memory of what once was a place on earth

 

no one sought to quell the agony the antagonizing the way I let down everything I believed and wanted to hold

 

my ancestors could not accept how futile my life has been and turned away

 

they all left me breached on the beach of my desert island marooned as a prisoner to walk to and from back and forth forever in chains

that dragged me down and kept me locked away on this abandoned point,  a misfit, a castaway, forgotten, whose eyes have been gouged out

left to grovel in misery for good

 

of the most notable Kevin my family, my spouses, my life ong friends Heather, my colleagues, my grand children, my integrity,  at least 250 people who I once knew with affection and who had provided comfort.

 

All I long for is to die alone in a remote place where no one will ever find me anon

I will make this final that I am forgotten 

 

quoth the raven, “Never More”  Never more will I come rapping will I come tapping will I come knocking at your door.”

 

and when the bell does toll it will be solitary, a hoarse quaking somber muffled gong that dissipates into stillness and never again is felt or whose tale is told

 

Graciously my silly meaningless life will disappear like a waft of smoke over the bog and be absorbed in the fog  a shroud of tyranny that has no bearing on anything ever again lost i n the swamp  trembling and fleeting immersed and disappeared 

I failed

 

 

 

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